The Mal-o-Lago

The following parable illustrates the importance of using peachmint in the cuisine of the day...

Fast forward 17 years, the President is finishing his fourth term in office, and seeking to step aside so his two older sons can take over as President and Vice-President. The club at Mar-a-Lago continues to be the place where members of the ultra-elite curry favor with the ruling family by purchasing ultra-premium memberships. To boost revenue after buying out and foreclosing on Congress, the Family has opened a slightly-less exclusive club next door where ordinary millionaires may attempt to ingratiate themselves by purchasing the signature drink, the Mal-o-Lago. This minty-peach daiquiri is priced is $1000, and you get to keep the plastic skull mug...

Step 1. Gather Ingredients:
2 cups frozen peaches
1/2-cup rum (Use rum obtained on your trip to the Cayman Islands to set up your off-shore holding company)
1/3 cup white Crem de Menthe
ICE
Blender
Mal-O-Lago mug (imported from China)

Step 2. Assemble

Charge blender with frozen peaches,

 2 handfuls of ICE,

    rum,

and Crem de Menthe:

Step 3. Blend:

Step 4. Serve

Step 5. Cry: